Saturday, March 23, 2013

Some Days Aren't Meant for Achieving Anything


  This week, the weather here has been quite cold for the season, and then warm the next day. Then, a very distant neighbor who is moving away decided to burn a bunch of plastic toys which generated a thick pungent black smoke that oddly blew this way.  I think my lungs were irritated and then I got exposed to a virus, or perhaps I have a new allergy to the buds on the trees.  I have had what seems like a chest cold ever since.  I never report even distant neighbors for things, but I have asked them not to burn plastics and tires before.  The result is a chest cold which is going to sink everything I had to do today.  Between using a nebulizer with medication, every four hours, cough drops, hot lemon and hot tea, I barely have time for anything else.   I did do one thing today.  I wanted a tasty lunch which would be easy to eat.  I reconstituted four portions of Augason Farm's freeze dried chili as directed.  Then I added a can of Campbell's tomato soup. (You can add the water with the can or leave it out. I've done it both ways.)  Then I cooked a large hamburger on the grill, crumbled it and placed it in the chili soup mix.  Sometimes a chili soup quickly made is a great comfort.  Have a great weekend. I think some low achievement days should be built into everyones  calendar.

Saturday, March 16, 2013

My Choice to Raise Children

(Photo: )

   Years ago, in the early nineteen-eighties, I was in high school and in college with a group of dear friends. Of my friends in high school, many of them planned to go to colleges scattered around the US.  The friends I made in college also had very clearly defined dreams.  They planned to become physicians, psychologists, nurses, and college professors.  Of all of them, I was the only one for which having children was an important goal.  Maybe our middle and high schools did such a good job telling us that a woman could have a very fulfilling career that everyone focused on that.  Maybe all the talk of the Russians having nukes aimed at us, and our having the same aimed at them, made them think again about having children. Maybe, to people our age, motherhood and all that accompanied it just looked tedious.  Of both groups of women, I was the only one who really wanted my own family.  Following graduation, from college, and my licensure as a registered nurse,  I married, bought a small home and had our first two children.  Shortly after, one of my friends from high school also had two children.  But, after that they  had no more. My group of high school friends, and my brainy group from college may have married, but no one else had children.  I went on in my thirties to have a third and a fourth beloved child.  Perhaps my friends found that their careers were not easily compatible with the demands of parenthood. Perhaps I was fortunate in that I found the profession of Nursing to be more compatible with raising young children.
               From the time that I was a small child I had always wanted my very own children. The objective was not to control, but to guide them as they grew and to have pride in their achievements with the full understanding that they are not copies of me.  Children come through us, not from us, and at an early age, this was clear to me.  I have not been disappointed. Each one of my four biological children have been my life's greatest joys, and each of them have been quite different.  Our fifth child who came to us through adoption has also been a great joy. It is a different experience, especially since he came to us as a teen, but no less magical and certainly no less important.
              One of my closest friends felt so strongly about her choice not to have children that she wrote a wonderful book about it, entitled Cheerfully Childless: The Humor Book for those Who Hesitate to Procreate.   I love the book, and I think it's hysterical  You might wish to pick up a copy. It's a brief and enjoyable read.   In the many years since all of us made our decisions much in the world has changed. My friends went on to successful careers of one type or another. A few divorced and remarried, but did not change their minds about having children, either biologically or through adoption.  I have probably not enjoyed as successful a career as they, as a consequence of having and raised five children, but this was my choice and for me, the correct one.  My friends without children are happy for me, and I am happy for them. When we get together, they too relate that they believe they made the best decision for themselves.
             Many times, even today, we still hear the outdated idea that women are not fulfilled unless they have children. This may have been true of me, but it certainly wasn't true of my friends. They also learned that in terms of teaching or guiding the young as a professor, that there are many ways to parent in the world. I learned that it is not truly possible to have it all, but then I have had and enjoyed what I wanted most.
             Perhaps rather than women with children judging those who decided parenthood was not for them, or rather than women with very successful careers judging those who chose to set their careers aside for a time, in order to parent healthy children, we should support those decisions.  Wasn't the original intent of feminism simply to encourage and support women in whatever choice in this regard, they chose to make ?

Thursday, March 14, 2013

An Injustice in New Jersey

         One of the reasons I like to write is that I dislike injustice.  All of us in this life will endure some injustices simply in the course of our times on Earth.  However, I do not suffer bullies well, and I tend to side with the person being bullied.
        Please see my post from another one of my blogs:

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Cancel Everything ! Power is Out.

This was the beginning of the storm.  Now we have twelve inches, and it's still snowing.

      It is unusual for there to be a Winter storm and blizzard so late in the season here.  The picture above was taken this morning, just before the power went out. We are expected to have snow until midnight tonight. We are running on short term generator power because we are low on diesel fuel.  My husband went out to get more diesel this morning, but we have an abundance of oaks, cedars and pines which have fallen over on the mountain trail and are preventing anyone from passing.   There is no telling when the power will come on again.  Stay safe everyone, wherever you are.

UPDATE:  My electricity has been off for four days. My internet has been down for one. Our landline telephone has been down for a day also.  I am reporting this with the aid of my daughter.